#37: Using Fitness to Build Self Confidence

Hi Friends,

It’s no secret that self esteem, image, and confidence are near the top of the list of reasons why someone pursues a fitness goal.

Unfortunately, many people tie their self image to what the mirror or the scale are saying - something that can be extremely discouraging for many people.

This week I’m going to talk about how pursuing a fitness goal will help you build up your self confidence completely independent of how much you weigh or how you look in the mirror.

Weekly Action Point

Last week we talked about finding some go-to meals. Meals that are easy, delicious, and healthy that you can keep coming back to.

For our weekly action point this week, I want you to take just 10-15 minutes to actually think about what those meals are for you.

Find 5 meals that you love and actually write them down in your notes app or something.

This gives you 5 go-to meals that you can come back to the next time you aren’t sure what to make for dinner or for your weekly meal prep.

If you missed last week’s newsletter, here it is. As a refresher - the point isn’t that you have to eat only these meals all the time.

The point is to give yourself something to default to when you are feeling tired or lower energy so that you don’t have to reinvent the wheel or put a ton of effort in to eat something healthy.

Build Self Confidence

Everyone wants to feel good about themselves.

There’s a ton of different things people can do to improve their self confidence, but in my opinion, fitness is very near the top.

Why?

Because fitness is hard. And not only is it hard, but it’s something that is largely in our own control.

We can use relationships, our jobs, etc. to find purpose and feel good about ourselves, but at the end of the day, those things involve other people that are out of your control.

The only thing in life that you have complete control over is yourself.

No one is going to make you go to the gym. No one else controls what you put into your mouth, what time you go to sleep (unless you have kids), how much water you are drinking, etc.

These are all things that are in our ability to control.

And the truth is, all of these things are difficult to do. If these things were easy, everyone would be in amazing shape all the time.

I believe that when you tell yourself you are going to do something hard, and then actually follow through and do it, it has a huge impact on your self confidence.

For example, if I tell myself I’m going to go to the gym three times a week, and then actually do it, I prove to myself that I’m capable of doing hard things.

I feel a lot better about myself as a result.

Guess what, if I have one week where I am successful going to the gym three times, I’m probably not going to see any difference at all in the mirror or the scale.

However, since I felt good about showing myself I can do hard things, I’m more likely to do it again the following week. I’ll continue just feeling better about myself each and every week, and before you know it, I’ve been successful 10 weeks in a row.

Approach fitness with this mindset, and results on the scale and in the mirror will follow.

Instead of having goals related to your weight like losing 10 pounds (which can be extremely defeating if the scale doesn’t move right away), how about you set a goal to feel good about the effort you put in?

That’s powerful stuff that will help create a snowball effect of consistency. And then over the long term, I’m sure you’ll see changes in the mirror and scale as a result.

Just avoid making the mirror or the scale your primary goal. Shift your mindset to focus on feeling good about the process of doing hard things, not just on the end result.

What about the opposite?

The kicker here is that the opposite can be true.

If you are telling yourself you are going to do something, and then don’t actually do it, it can be extremely damaging to your self confidence and how you feel about yourself.

When you don’t do things that you told yourself you are going to do, it feels like you are letting yourself down.

When you feel let down and discouraged, you are WAY less likely to continue doing something long term.

So if you are someone who is always setting insanely lofty fitness goals and then giving up after a couple weeks, this is likely why.

For example, if you told yourself you are going to the gym 6 days per week, and then only go three, you feel like you failed on what you told yourself.

So why tell yourself you are going to do 6 days in the gym if it’s completely unnecessary?

Setting reasonable fitness goals is definitely a component here. But then when you set goals, actually follow through and do what you told yourself you are going to do. And yes, it’s hard. That’s the idea: prove to yourself you can do hard things.

Because then you feel good about yourself like we talked about above.

Continuously telling yourself you are going to do something and then not ever doing it is exhausting and extremely discouraging.

You start to feel like you can’t do it, because that’s the narrative you are writing for yourself.

Control what you can control. And in this case, the only thing you can control is yourself.

Self confidence can be an extremely sensitive topic for many people.

Hopefully the main point I’m trying to make is getting across.

To summarize this newsletter:

When you live up to doing hard things that you told yourself you were going to do, it has massive benefits on your self confidence and how you feel about yourself, increasing your chances of success in the long term.

When you don’t do things you told yourself you were going to do, it can be extremely damaging to your self confidence, leading you to get discouraged and give up on your fitness goals.

Ben’s Best

Here is an idea to prepping proteins that I love:

thejosephabell

2 followers

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Having protein on hand throughout the week is one of the most important parts. If you didn’t want to meal prep full meals, you could do your chicken (or steak, pork, or any meat) like this and either cook it all at the beginning of the week, or have it ready to go and cook it during the week.

Then grab a vegetable, some sort of carb like rice/potato, and you have yourself a full meal that was extremely easy.

If you want something with a bit more effort, here is another idea. Felt like this one looked absolutely delicious:

cheffinwithzach

959K followers

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That’s all I have for you guys this week.

Have an awesome week, and remember to do hard things!

Ben